E
Eliminate your Excuses
When things go wrong and they frequently do, what do you say to yourself? “That wasn’t my fault” “If only….. then that wouldn’t have happened” “I wish things would go my way, just once” Or do you acknowledge that the outcome is oftendue to some oversight or lack of preparation on your part? Do you find excuses to cover your deficiencies?
When I started my morning classes at the end of September I set off on the first day expecting to arrive on time. I’d travelled this route many, many times and I knew how long it took to arrive there on a normal day. I arrived ten minutes late and was flustered at being late. However, as I apologised to my students for being late and told them I had not anticipated such heavy traffic on the route I took, I also said that I’d be leaving a lot earlier in the future weeks to ensure that I would arrive on time. I was fully aware of my error, which was what led to me being late. It was not the fault of the heavy traffic and I had no intention of hiding behind it as an excuse. It was my complacency towards the route, and not anticipating the unexpected that led to me being late.
There are times when things are out of our control and we don’t anticipate the results, but how we react to that
determines how we will or won’t progress. One women I read about recently was diagnosed with cancer and decided to stay cheerful and upbeat about her treatment and recovery process. She even blogged about how she was discharged from hospital because she was “disgustingly happy” and it wasn’t going down well with the doctors, nursing staff or other patients. She had decided that her sadness (at different things) had allowed the cancer to take hold and that she was going to be positive and happy from that point on. She is in remission and a lot sooner than expected.
Now that is an extreme example, but look at how you react to the events in your life. Do you allow yourself to get angry every time someone in your family pushes those reactionary buttons? What would happen if you didn’t react as normal, instead of getting angry, why not stay calm and don’t react. By doing that we are eliminating the excuse that “they made me….”, we act instead of re-act, in effect we eliminate the excuse that it is someone else’s fault for our own behaviour.
If you are making excuses in one part of your life what other parts of your life are you making excuses in? Fed up
getting passed over for promotion – not your fault? How can you take responsibility for getting seriously considered for promotion? Do you often row with your loved ones and pick fights for the fun of it, or criticise and belittle them for your entertainment and retort when confronted about it that they need to toughen up, or that they have no sense of humour? Do you leave everything to the last minute and then blame other things for not being prepared? Do you cut corners on things that you do, and then wonder why they don’t turn out as expected? Do you hide behind “everybody else does it, so why shouldn’t I?”.
At what point will you take control of your life and live it the way you want, with full responsibility for it’s ups and it’s downs? Me…..I’m doing just that….and loving every minute of it.
4 responses to “E – Eliminate your Excuses”
When I obtained promotion some years ago I was one of seven candidates for two posts. The first two successful applicants were job-sharer’s which meant that the third applicant was also successful and was offered the promotion.
Within weeks of being told the outcome of the interviews, long before tenure began a member of staff told me that “it’s okay, we know it wasn’t your fault you got the job!”
Aside from being floored by the words and the attitude so clearly behind them, my only question was if I wasn’t responsible who was?! My employment history is good, my cv reads well and I conducted myself well at interview – so just who was the culprit?
Obviously my unsuccessful colleagues didn’t want to blame me for my success, but they felt the need to blame someone else for the fact that I was promoted in their place…
That Polly, clearly demonstrates what I was saying. You took responsiblity for your success and some of your colleagues didn’t, instead they blamed your bosses and used that as an excuse for their lack of progression, then sugar-coated it by saying they didn’t blame you.
How do you take responsibility without blaming yourself for previous mistakes?
There is a huge difference between responsibility and blame. Responsibility is acknowledging your short-comings and taking action to improve them, blame had no action for betterment behind it, it is just an exit door to duck out of.